I just learned that Cumulonimbus and Nonces Juicy have separated and moved into different houses. This is heartbreaking news. I've know her from early childhood (she's my first cousin) and him for nearly four decades. When we were both starting families, they actually lived with us for a few months. Consequently, my two oldest daughters are still good friends with their two.
He was my #1 drinking buddy from those early family days till I got sober. One 4th of July about 11 or 12 years ago, he asked me take him to an A.A. meeting. I did, and he lasted for about four years, as I recall. I love this man. I only very rarely see him. From what I hear he's getting progressively worse—no surpise there—and the consequences are getting greater. Now here's another one.
He was my #1 drinking buddy from those early family days till I got sober. One 4th of July about 11 or 12 years ago, he asked me take him to an A.A. meeting. I did, and he lasted for about four years, as I recall. I love this man. I only very rarely see him. From what I hear he's getting progressively worse—no surpise there—and the consequences are getting greater. Now here's another one.
While he was on board, we regularly attended a Sunday meeting together in my sponsor's living room. A few years after he went out, I bumped into him. I took the opportunity to remind him that I'm there to help whenever he's ready. He practically made the sign of the cross to keep me away from him and took off as quickly as he could. Apparently, that attitude hasn't changed.
I'll be praying for both of them, and their children. If anyone else is willing to join me, I'd greatly appreciate it.
6 comments:
so sad to watch those we love suffer
wishing you strength with you ex-drinking and ex-sober buddy. it's so sad to watch and being powerless to do something about it....
I had a good friend like this. She told me once that I represented pain to her, and that when she saw me she had conflicting feelings of love and hate, because I had stayed sober and she had not. We know your friend is in pain, because we've been there. I'm sorry you're suffering too.
I will send up blessings for the guy. I've been in his shoes. Perhaps the next time something like this happens and it's obvious it's the spirituality that's giving someone a problem, you could suggest LSR (LifeRing Secular Recovery). www.unhooked.com. What works for you may not be the thing for him. Just a thought.
His problem wasn't with spirituality, Angela; he was more than fine with that. I believe it was his fear of doing a 4th and 5th step—he never got past the 3rd step. I suspect he has some deep dark secret that he is terrified of admitting to himself, let alone to another human being.
Prayer said.
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